With a soft pop, the door comes open. The smell assaults you like a Mortal Kombat uppercut straight to the nostril. You look inside, but all you see is an ill-defined dark greenish lump. Part of that is because your eyes are watering, but the other part is because whatever it is, it’s covered in something else. Something dark green…something alive. You slam the refrigerator door shut, cursing Janet in Accounting — that was her raw vegan paleo probiotic gluten-free seitan kombucha steak, but you know she’s never going to clean up the primitive civilization that’s growing ever so slowly at 35 degrees Fahrenheit.
Time to call the experts. Janitorial Services of Encino to the rescue! Infrasprays up! Squeegeetherms connected! MegaJanitorial is go! Form Broom and Mop! Form Towel and Bottle! And I’ll Form…the Disinfectant! Let’s Go JanitorForce!…yeah, this fight we’re going straight for the Blazing Sponge.
That Green Thing is a Terrorist. Don’t Negotiate.
If there’s an ill-defined green mass — or anything similar — keeping you from opening your office fridge, don’t play around. Not every form of mold is toxic, but every form of mold is a health risk. And worst of all, if that horror has been growing like that for even 48 hours, you’re going to need that refrigerator cleaned like no one has cleaned it since it was first built. If you let even a dozen mold spores come to rest in a tiny damp spot somewhere in the channel that the vegetable tray’s rollers move along, all of the rest of your wiping and throwing away isn’t going to cut it. You have to kill off the intrusive colony completely.
That’s what MegaJanitorial is for — not just for keeping everything in your workplace clean enough to continue operating week after week, season after season, decade after decade, but also for tackling the truly profound messes that no one else wants to — or can stand to — deal with.
Fortunately, from your perspective, it’s not even particularly difficult — you just have to pick up the phone, call the number in the upper left corner of this very screen, and we’ll unleash the Five Robot Lio–err, that is to say, we’ll get our most relevant, most talented guys and make sure they get out there and get it taken care of. Even if it’s developed the wheel and the concept of ceremonial burial by the time we get there.
